and im slowly fading away

so ive been thinking
im not sure how much i miss him, he's so, wonderful, and its true i loved him, but how long can one person just long for the other while that other person is just fine without them?
he was one of the greatest people to ever come into my life, and i still love him with all of my heart
it would be soo much easier if i was mad at him, or if HE had done something wrong. he did nothing to make the relationship end. it was all me, i was the one who was scared and doubtful. i was the one who questioned, everything. and on top of it all, i had my problems, and i met ,, him, and i fell in love with him
thats the worst thing you can ever feel, loving two people at once.
shelton is so amazing, i cant help but miss him, but tyler was also so wonderful, and we never had a relationship, he never felt anything for me, i just fell in love witth him, a short lived fall, but it was deep, and it turned my world upside down.
i only wanted to quit because i thought changing would make him love me
turns out he will only love me as a friend, and its heartbreaking sometimes
but then again i doubt i would make him happy, i doubt i would change enough for his love
im just lost right now
the day was good, and then i started thinking and missing

And I fell hard, quickly. I think this is me finally realizing that it wasn't my fault, that things aren't just meant to be. I am going to stop being bitter and start being happy for all of the wealth that comes to him, because he will always have a special place in my heart and I think that he knows that.